Forget about special talents — the ability to handle frustration is critical to success
We all feel frustrated from time to time: a lump forms in our throat and a feeling of helplessness invades us, as if we wanted to run away, but a great wall prevented us. True?
It may be that you carry this frustration from home, or that some situation in the office – perhaps an argument with your boss, your subordinates or a co-worker – has triggered it. Whatever its source, dragging this feeling and letting it build up is never a good idea.
Daniel Goleman, creator of the concept of emotional intelligence , considers that the ability to handle frustration is one of the most important to achieve success. It is much more important than having endless special talents!
Before you quit without thinking about the consequences or flood your office with yelling, take note of these tips. Your problems may not magically disappear, but one thing is for sure: you will be able to handle them much more wisely.
Acknowledge when you feel frustrated
It sounds obvious, but that doesn’t make it any less true: the first step in dealing with frustration is certainly acknowledging it. Acknowledging our stumbling blocks or feeling disappointed does not make us weak… quite the opposite! Having emotional intelligence implies, first of all, learning to recognize our emotions as well as what causes them.
Trust your potential
If you know your capabilities, know how to exploit your talents and trust what you are capable of, it will take much more than a bad streak to bring you down. Recognize your skills and cultivate them to go even further.
Know your limitations
Just as you must recognize your qualities, it is important that you know how far you can go. This does not mean that you are mediocre or that you do not aspire to improve: you simply know what tools are available to you to achieve your goals, and you are looking for a way to get the best out of them. If you know your limitations and potentialities, the stumbles will be much less hard.
Don’t take anything personal
In a fit of anger, your boss yelled at you that you had made an “unacceptable” mistake. Or maybe one of your subordinates was so distracted that they missed a key aspect of growing your business. Does your boss hate you? Does your employee want to make your life impossible? Whether someone breaks out at you or unleashes your anger, it’s important to keep in mind that, in the confines of an office, NOTHING is personal. So don’t take it as such.
Adjust your strategy
People destined to fail take every stumble as a sign that they shouldn’t move on. Those with emotional intelligence see every fall as an opportunity to see what went wrong and readjust their strategy. They are practical: they preserve what works for them, discard what does not, and thus achieve an increasingly effective growth strategy.
No, meditating is not just for Buddhist monks or hippies seeking to achieve nirvana. If you knew that the most successful people in managing their emotions (and their businesses) have the habit of meditating daily, you would be surprised… For example? Oprah Winfrey or Madonna. Meditating not only allows you to calm down, but also to enter a state of self-awareness that helps you have better control of your emotions.